Beyond the Emotion: Navigating a Nanny Termination Legally and Professionally

Oct 15, 2025 | GTM Blog

Dealing with a nanny termination is difficult. Because this person has been welcomed into your home and developed a bond with your children, the process goes beyond a standard professional separation.

If the split is amicable, like when your children age out of needing a nanny or your family is moving, the transition is smoother. However, firing a nanny for cause requires a thoughtful, structured approach to protect your family and your compliance as an employer.

Here are the essential steps for navigating a nanny termination, starting long before you ever need to have that final conversation.

Laying the Legal and Professional Foundation

The most critical preparation takes place before your nanny’s first day of work. Establishing clear documentation is the best defense against miscommunication or legal issues down the road.

Define Terms in the Work Agreement

Your work agreement (or contract) must contain explicit language on termination and resignation procedures. This includes the required notice for both parties, any offered severance, and clear grounds for immediate firing (such as illegal actions, gross misconduct, or putting children in danger).

Include an at-will employment statement. This means the employment relationship can be ended by either party at any time, for any reason (as long as it’s not illegal). Have both parties sign the document, acknowledging that they understand these terms.

Understand At-Will Employment

In nearly every state (all but Montana), employment is presumed to be at-will. This gives you, the employer, the flexibility to terminate the relationship without needing to give a warning or show “just cause” for most performance issues, provided your decision is not discriminatory (such as being based on race, gender, or age).

Managing Performance and Documenting Issues

Before jumping to termination, proper management and documentation can either correct the problem or provide the evidence needed for dismissal.

Conduct Regular Performance Reviews

Regular job performance evaluations are key to any professional relationship. These reviews help you identify areas where your nanny can improve, preventing a small issue from becoming a firing offense. Establishing guidelines and providing structured feedback gives your employee a chance to get back on track.

Identify, Address, and Document All Issues

If performance or behavior is unsatisfactory, you must identify, address, and document the problem promptly. Provide written warnings that are dated and signed by both you and your nanny. This creates a paper trail that demonstrates:

You gave the employee a chance to correct their performance.
The termination, if it happens, is the final step in a progressive process.
You have evidence of just cause should the nanny file for unemployment. (Nannies fired for misconduct or their own actions may be denied unemployment benefits.)

Self-Reflect: Is the Cause Valid?

Before terminating, ask yourself if the issue is a genuine fault of the employee or a result of unrealistic expectations or poor communication on your part. Valid reasons for dismissal include repeated instances of:

Absenteeism or unreliability
Poor work quality or lack of attention/neglect
Failure to perform agreed-upon tasks or enforce house rules

The Termination Event

When the decision is made, a clean, professional break is essential for all parties.

Know When to Fire Immediately

While you can often allow time for correction, you should never give second chances for actions that are illegal, reckless, or endanger your children. Grounds for immediate termination include misconduct, theft, substance abuse on the job, dishonesty, or major safety concerns.

Plan for Coverage and Compliance

Before the conversation, set a backup plan for childcare to avoid asking the terminated employee to stay on for another day. Also, check your state’s employment laws regarding final paychecks and notification requirements to ensure compliance.

Decide on Notice and Severance

Notice and Severance are NOT required when an employee is fired immediately for cause (misconduct/safety). It is not recommended to allow a fired nanny to provide notice by working an additional two weeks.
If the nanny is let go through no fault of their own (relocation, children starting school), providing at least two weeks’ notice and a severance (a common guideline is one week’s pay per year of service) is customary and highly recommended.

Have a Professional Conversation

Terminations should always be done in person- never via phone, text, or email. The conversation should be:

Concise and Factual: State clearly that their employment is terminated and the exact reason why (referencing prior documented issues).
Final: Be firm. Do not let the conversation turn into an argument, and do not offer false hope of future babysitting or re-hire.
Private: Hold the conversation at the end of the workday with an adult witness present, away from your children.

At the close of the meeting, collect all family property (keys, credit cards, car seats, etc.) and provide the nanny with a termination letter.

Finalizing the Process

Following the termination, a few final administrative steps are necessary.

Write a Termination Letter and Final Paycheck

The termination letter should confirm the time and date of dismissal and clearly state what is included in the final paycheck (which must be issued by your state’s deadline). This includes pay for all hours worked up to the termination time and potentially unused PTO, depending on your state’s laws and your work agreement.

Consider a Letter of Recommendation

If you let your nanny go due to a poor “fit” or for reasons outside their performance (like a family move), providing a letter of recommendation is the right thing to do to ease their job search. If you had serious issues, you are not obligated to write one, but if you are contacted as a reference, you must be honest about both the employee’s strengths and weaknesses.

Take Post-Termination Precautions

Immediately change your home security codes and notify school, daycare, and family personnel that the nanny no longer has authorization for pickup or access to information.

Respond to State Correspondence

If your former employee files for unemployment, the state will contact you. You must respond and provide documentation of the termination for cause to minimize the risk of paying increased unemployment taxes. To make sure you are in compliance with all laws relating to hiring and terminating your nanny, contact us today at (800) 929-9213 or book a complimentary, no-obligation consultation.